I want to remember the end of my pregnancy as being a wonderful time. That's going to be really hard since I'm clocking in less than 4 hours of sleep a night, my feet look like hairless hobbit feet (and they hurt from the excessive swelling) and I've been reduced down to wearing my husband's shoes if I want to leave the apt. It feels like my belly button might rip open any second now. And I've been feeling rather blue lately, the tears come and go about as often as I am running off to the toilet to take those phantom pees. But all these discomforts magically disappear when I feel our little guy give me a nudge to say "hey, I'm here...". I rub his little bottom, the shape of his little bum is unmistakable when he's pushing up with his legs. I rub his back and soothe away his frequent hiccups he's had this week. I will miss feeling him grow inside of me. This feeling that is hard to put to words, what it feels like to have life growing from me. I suddenly feel not so alone in this world... not so aware of my mortality.
I sit here cradling my stomach and humming made up love songs to my son-to-be. I want to remember moments like this in the years to come. The moments before the arrival. Who knows when I'll have time to actually update my blog, email or watch that list of movies I just posted. Or even really sleep. Does it all really matter considering what is about to happen?
Would I change anything if I could? No way. My life is taking me in the direction it's supposed to go. I am ready to live it. Six more days... This has been the longest week of my life.