Testing 1, 2, 4...

I mean 3.

This pretty much sums up the state of my mind right now. I can't count straight. I can't see straight. I am dead tired.

We got back from the United States on Sunday.  I was glad to be back in France. I missed our home. The US has become a place to visit for me now. I like it that way. 

So, back to my state of mind. I am tired. I am extended beyond my capacities.  I type this at 2:15am and my son is not asleep. Jet lag. Certainly. Stubbornness. Most definitely. But you say to yourself, "oh this will pass once he's over the jet lag". Let me tell you this: he has been doing this screaming at 2am for the past month. In central time zone and then the mountain time zone and now in 0 +1 or Paris/Amsterdam time zone at 2 am, the boy screams.  I just timed him with two interventions from mama, Max just screamed his head off for nearly three hours. Not crying. Not the wind down crying. Screaming. A scream so loud that it wakes my husband up and he is wearing ear plugs.

Our trip to the US? Almost a bust. I was so happy to see my family especially my aunt and uncle that came from far to meet Max. Christmas eve was wonderful. I loved seeing Max with his cousins who are the same age play together. They will have so much fun growing up together.

But right now another trip to the US is the furthest thing from my mind. Another trip anywhere just isn't even fathomable.  You know what else I've been thinking about? Not another child!*

Now it's been three hours after the scream fest started and I think I can go to bed. I hear my son hiccuping from crying and sucking his thumb. Perhaps sleep will envelope him and he will dream sweet baby dreams? More on our trip to the US soon...

Good night!

*Ask me again in a few months.

Comments

[La Rêveuse]

Oh, hon, I'm so sorry. I hear you. Rowan had a night last night, too. It will get better. Have some ice cream. ((((Flare))))

[materfamilias]

Something I'm glad is far behind me -- traveling with kids! Impressive that your little guy manages to keep track of 2 a.m. over so many time zones (altho' I'm sure "impressive" is hardly the word you'd choose). Hope that as you settle back into home and your own schedule, life will get easier.

[Kelly]

I cannot even Imagine taking that big of a trip with a Baby Max's age. I give you props just for doing it.
Just a thought...a few times when my kids have screamed (not just cried)like you are discribing, they had ear infections. Any chance he could have one of those? Usually comes after a cold type of virus. It always seemed to bother them mostly at night time as well, probably b/c during the day they could deal with the pain by distraction. If he does then he may need antibiotics...and they have ear drops that help the pain.
I hope things get better for you soon!

[Emily]

Poor little guy and poor little guy's momma. I hope you both had a good night's sleep. :)

[Kinuk]

We had similar problems with A, when we travelled back from Canada, but it was definitely jetlag. It doesn't sound like Max has jetlag. As Kelly said, maybe it is an ear infection or another medical issue?

I hope it gets better soon! Hang in there!

[Mary Anne]

hmmm...hadn't thought about ears...but my thought is that his ears would have been awful on the plane ride too....but couldn't hurt to have them looked at!

MA

[mamie]

oh amy, i am so sorry. i have read elsewhere about a nine month sleep regression. maybe he is almost through it (please, please for your sake). i am living in a bit of abject terror thinking of it with two. hang in there, as they say, this too shall pass.

[Daisy]

My sympathies. Those non-sleep nights are the worst, and when they last a long time, mom suffers the most. Rest in the knowledge that while you will remember this sleepness stretch, eventually, he won't.

[Alice]

Welcome back Aimée and Bonne Année ! I'm SOOO sorry that little Max is miserable and screaming so much, and making life so difficult -- I do hope he'll adjust to the time change very soon and make things better and easier for everyone. I can only imagine what a challenge it must be...

It sounds like you had a wonderful trip to the U.S. to visit your family. I feel the same as you: I was back seeing everyone for New Year's, and I realize more and more as the years go by that the U.S. is no longer my home, but a place that I visit. It's heart-wrenching, and I know my parents don't like to hear it, but it's just honestly how I feel. Life here isn't easy, trust me, but it's where I have made my home. And I feel comfortable about that too. My trip back to the U.S. was a bit of an emotional roller-coaster ride this year, for various reasons, so that made it harder, and not as much of a vacation. But I did get to rest and see family and old friends, so it was well worth it!

Hang in there and take good care of yourself and little Max!